My Father At 80 – Celebrating My Lesson in Moral Authority, My Mentor and My Hero
Nollywood? I have not had the chance or time to watch it in ages. The plethora of Nigerian TV stations in the UK and the short distance between Nigeria and London had ensured that my nuclear family was never far away from the latest Nollywood movie releases until year 2011 when out of what some deem as sheer madness, we moved further away from Nigeria to a much colder location.
But I remember the advert to one of the movies which I never got to watch. The scene opened with a terrified young boy on the roof of a house. How he got there in the first instance, do not ask me. On the ground was an elderly man, cajoling the terrified lad on the roof to jump down, promising to catch him. After much persuasion from the elderly man, the boy summoned enough courage to jump in anticipation that he would be caught mid-air as promised by the man on the ground. Alas, the older man failed to fulfil his promise, he did not even make an attempt to catch the lad as he came tumbling down to mother-earth.
When the boy was able to get over the agony of being bruised from the jump and challenged the old man about his failure and deceit, the response he got was that the boy must learn never to trust anyone, including him, the crafty old man who now transpired to be the boy’s father.
The above stated advert, seen more than six years ago, tells a sad tale of what morally obtains in Nigeria of today where it is difficult to trust anyone, including your own blood relations.
I then contrast the above scenario to what I have been lucky to experience and enjoy as a son. Having a father I can have an absolute trust in.
I was a budding boy scout and was taught in our numerous meetings as well as camping exploits that you Obey First And Then Complain. Even though I was at that age when you begin to rebel, questioning rules and sometimes authority, I still had some level of absolute obedience to my parents, not because they were disciplinarians as their wards would testify, but more because I could trust them to wish the best for me and my siblings.
During one of my home trips from school, my Dad asked me one evening to join him in clearing a pile of planks that had been sitting in between the main house and the boys’ quarter. I obliged. A few minutes after we started, as I lifted one of the planks from my end in sequence with my father, he instructed me to drop the plank back into its position. Without any hesitation, I complied. The next thing I saw my Dad doing was walking away only to come back with a big stick. He then asked me to move to his own position whilst he moved to mine. Thereafter, he asked me to lift the plank sideways from where I was. As I did so, the next thing I saw was the big stick in his hand bearing down on a snake that had hid underneath the plank, poised to strike where I was previously working from.
When he instructed me to drop the plank back into its position, if I had hesitated or started to query why, my story today would have had a completely different and probably agonising ending.
My father is not just a lesson to me in moral authority, trust and obedience, he is my mentor and my hero. To me and all those who know him, my father remains as trustworthy, dependable, honest, straightforward and caring as you would find most parents of his generation.
I do not know another elderly man beside my father, that you will entrust a project to, who will open an exercise book with details of how much the smallest nail cost, how much he received, how much he has spent, how much is owed and to whom, and where any remaining balance has been kept.
On behalf of his biological children, grandchildren, and his numerous non-biological children, grandchildren as well as great-grandchildren, my prayer is that the Lord will grant Baba Kunle more grace, more strength, more years in good health to enjoy the worthy fruits of his selfless labour. That his dreams yet to become a reality will manifest in his lifetime.
Happy 80th birthday to the best Dad in the whole world.
