No Heir, No Spare.

No Heir, No Spare.
by ‘Kunle Ojeleye

I have twins.
They both have their strengths and weaknesses.
From the womb, one seems eager to learn and do things earlier than the other.
He was the one that burst their mum’s water causing them to come 3 months prematurely.
To underscore what I mean, he got interested in doing household chores including cooking at age 4.
Recently, I have had to hide my car keys in a far away location when on their way back from school, he told me he is going to buy a 7-seater car, put me and the mum in the middle seat, while he and his brother sit in the front with him driving. Then I heard him telling his brother that driving a car is easy. You put it in reverse to go back ward, and then put it in drive to go forward.
Jesus help me.

Then I also noticed a sense of entitlement that I needed to quickly nip in the bud.
Whilst he has a sense of responsibility for his brother, telling me when I am instructing the other that “Don’t worry I will look after him”, he sometimes behave towards the other as if he is 3 years older, rather than 5 minutes.
As such, I have regularly sat them down to make them understand they are responsible for each other, must care for each other, resolve their disputes amicably, never to lash at each other verbally or physically, learn to apologise when wrong, and love each other as Dad/Mum loves them equally.

My Dad started his postgraduate study in Leicester, UK three months after Prince Charles married Princess Diana.
He came back home in 1982 with souvenirs of the marriage.
This piqued my interest in the Royal family which was enhanced when I found myself in the UK about eight years later.

I have always seen the rebellious streak in Prince Harry.
I thought he inherited it partly from his Dad and Mum.
Not until this evening when I began to read Spare,
Did I realise how negatively impacted Harry had been from birth and childhood.

Reading Spare makes me realise the responsibility I have as a father,
Not to make any of my children feel unwanted, unloved,
Or that he/she is a child of convenience,
As Harry was made to understand from childhood.

When I say that I feel pity for Prince Harry,
Rather than the tongue lashing from many as if he is an untrained, irresponsible child,
I will henceforth do so from a stronger position, having read his memoir.

Regardless of the role tradition has denoted for any child,
In bringing up your children,
Provide them with a level playing field of love and training.

There should be,
No Heir, No Spare.

Facebook Post: 2023-01-21 T19:41:57